Trevor and Carrie are in a basement playing pool.
Carrie stares at the arrangement of balls. She pouts in concentration
Trevor. And I just think. There’s too much. There’s. Like. There’s a chair. In. In, like, India. And it’s one of millions of chairs in India. Billions probably. And I’ll never see it. And I’ll never know it exists. But it’s there and someone uses it every day. And it was built by someone. And in the factory where it was built the guy who made it uses another chair. And that chair was built by someone. And when he goes home there’s a chair in his living room. And in his sister’s living room. And in the living room of everyone he knows and everyone he doesn’t know. And it’s not even about chairs. Because for every chair there’s a lamp. And a. A table and. I don’t know, a doorhandle that had to be made. Each time someone has spent part of their life with this object. That we know nothing about and never will because our remit of existence is so inconceivably tiny. And why do these objects get to outlast us? Because they will. Most of them will. And we die and they just carry on existing. And we keep adding stuff to the world that’ll just keep on. And the millions of people who just die, and are mourned, and who leave behind all kinds of mess, and. But then I think maybe that’s the point. Maybe humans, people, are the cheapest commodity. Maybe that’s just the way it’s supposed to be. But then I think so why, like, imbue us with so much passion. And curiosity. And. And. And fear. Fear of death, which is like fear of blinking. Why not just make us little blobs with impulses that make us do whatever we’re supposed to do? And fear of death might just be fear of not being around anymore. But then we’re hardly around anywhere anyway, even when we’re alive. Our life is like a tiny pin of light in a vast vast massive black hall. And all we ever see and experience is the tiny minute thin sliver of light directly in front of us. And I look around at the people I love, like you, and I just think. We’re all on this sinking ship and we’re definitely definitely going to die. And that beautiful face of yours and your beautiful skull is definitely going to become dust or sediment in some rock. That is absolutely going to happen and no one can care because no one will know. I can’t bear it. And there’s so many roads. Roads leading to every tiny little place. And it scares me. It terrifies me. You know?
Carrie bends down. Takes a shot.
Carrie. Fuck. Fuck’s sake.
She offers Trevor the cue.
Carrie. Two shots.